Chapter 8

Goldie Jones

Diana arrived at her apartment, threw down her keys and literally collapsed on the couch. Her head was in a whirl, and she could hardly think straight. She had never been more confused than she was at this moment. She had actually rebuffed Vincent because she knew he was still in love with Catherine and didn't want to be a second choice. She had responded to Joe's kisses in a way that she had not thought possible, since she had always thought of Joe as a friend, even though he seemed to be more interested in her than she was in him. Why then, did his embrace stir her to a new heightened feeling? And why did she pass up the first chance to kiss Vincent, even if she thought he was still in love with Catherine​? Where was that fighting spirit she once presented to the world?

Although Diana wasn't exactly jealous of Catherine, and especially not now, perhaps she still felt as though she might be intruding on something very special that Vincent and Catherine shared.

Meanwhile, Vincent was having a dilemma of his own, still agonizing over the loss of Catherine, and feeling that any interest in another woman would betray Catherine's memory; but he was feeling as though he was also being disloyal to Diana, who had been his friend and confidante for several years. And though he had warm feelings for Diana, he did not have the same feelings for her that he had for Catherine. Was Bridget correct in saying that he could love again without feeling guilty? How would she know? She couldn't judge him by her own experience, because everyone is different. And the romance between Vincent and Catherine was very unique and different.

Vincent usually confided in Father, but for some reason he pushed that thought out of his mind. He just needed to be by himself, to think things over without interference from anyone, no matter how well-intentioned they were.

The Winterfest activities were finally winding down, and people were leaving. Vincent had enjoyed the fellowship of his tunnel friends and helpers, had participated in the festivities and ceremonies, even though he didn't get to spend as much time with Diana as he had planned. And he had experienced a different emotion when she was called away – he actually worried about her and wondered what was going on. He felt relieved when she had returned to the tunnels, although he noticed that she was rather flushed and unkempt.

That night he slept fitfully.

Meanwhile, Diana had fallen asleep on her couch, when the phone rang. It was Susan, wanting to know all about her evening. Diana sighed. The last thing she felt like doing right now was talking. She wanted to be alone with her thoughts, but Susan was persistent.

"So tell me what happened," she insisted, "You're awfully quiet for someone who had such great expectations of the evening."

"I'm really tired, Susan. In fact you woke me from a deep sleep here on my couch. Can we talk about this tomorrow morning?"

There was a long pause before Susan finally spoke up. "Wow! It must have been either very good or very bad. Which was it? Can you at least tell me that much?"

Diana's head was splitting. "Please, Susan, let me call you in the morning."

"Uh-oh, I sense things didn't go so well," Susan persisted. "So you didn't get to first base, is that it?"

Diana knew her sister wasn't going to give up easily. "It's not what you think at all. I had a very interesting experience, but I'm just too whacked out to talk about it now. I promise to fill you in on all the details tomorrow. Now can I please get comfortable and get to sleep?"

"You not only didn't get to first base, you must have struck out. Is that it?" There was silence on the other end of the phone. "Okay, okay. I'll let you go, but you'd better not spare any details tomorrow, promise?"

"There's really not that much to tell, but yes, I'll talk to you tomorrow." Diana hung up the phone before Susan could get another word in.

Then she wondered what she would tell Susan. Would she admit that she had a chance to kiss Vincent after nearly five years of making that her goal, and then turned him down? Would she tell her that she and Joe had a brief but momentous clinch, which left her shaken and confused? And what would Susan think of all that? She'd either be full of useless advice, or insist that Diana see a shrink. As sisters, Diana and Susan were close, but they really didn't understand one another that well. Susan just couldn't understand why Diana didn't pursue Vincent with more of a vengeance, and Diana thought that Susan – well, that Susan just didn't get it. By pursuing Vincent with a vengeance, Diana would have lost him long ago. Now she wondered if she really wanted him, and never once entertained that thought until Joe's kiss. If she were undecided about her relationship with Vincent before, she was even more confused about it now.

 

Vincent tossed and turned, and couldn't get to sleep. His thoughts were of Catherine and Diana, as he weighed the possibilities of what Bridget had suggested. Was it really possible for him to have a romantic relationship with Diana when his heart still belonged to Catherine? But at the same time, he was not being fair to Diana, who had been at his side ever since she found him distraught at Catherine's gravesite, and brought him back to reasonable happiness, although it took a lot of time. He wondered if her patience would someday wear thin, and worried that she may find someone Above who could provide a better situation for her. He couldn't exactly picture Diana living below, but then he had the same reservations about Catherine. Successful career women who were accustomed to the big city ambiance, could scarcely be content in the sequestered world of the tunnels – or could they?

Diana climbed into bed after substituting her glamorous attire for a baggy sweatsuit, in which she felt far more at home. She finally drifted off to sleep, her mind torn and troubled.

***

Vincent couldn't remember falling asleep, but Catherine came to him in a dream. She was as lovely as he remembered, her sweet smile bringing tears to his eyes. He held her close and whispered how much he loved her. "I'll always remember you, Catherine. My love for you will never fade."

"I appreciate that," the dream-Catherine assured him, "And I feel the same. But I can't be your partner in life, and our little Jacob needs someone to care for him, a mother to love and nurture him."

Vincent groaned. "I don't know what to do, Catherine. I feel that any way I turn will hurt someone, whether it is you, Diana or Jacob. As for myself, I am lost."

"You are not lost, Vincent. You know what it is you must do. You're afraid of hurting me, but I understand. Things are much different now. You must go to Diana before it's too late, before she falls in love with someone else. You have to be realistic, if not for yourself, for Jacob. Diana is a fine woman and she would make you happy."

"Wait, Catherine, don't go," Vincent cried, as the vision of Catherine faded and disappeared. Then he woke up with a start, sitting up in bed. "Don't go," he repeated aloud to the chamber, empty except for him. He rubbed his eyes and looked around, but there was no sign of Catherine. He thought he caught a faint scent of the perfume she always wore.

***

Diana slept fitfully, moaning in her sleep. She felt a gentle tug on her shoulder, and looked up to see Catherine staring at her. "Don't be frightened. I came to tell you something."

"What? How can this be? How did you-- ""

"I come to you in your dreams," the vision of Catherine said, "I just wanted to say it's all right for you and Vincent to be together. I told him the same thing. I never want to cast a shadow on his happiness or yours. So I've come to give you both my blessings."

Diana reached out to touch this apparition who looked and sounded like Catherine, but was rapidly fading. Diana wasn't sure whether she had actually experienced this, or if it was indeed a dream. She had heard at one time that spirits often come to those whose souls are in need of guidance. This must be an omen, a good sign. It means Vincent and I are meant to be together, she told herself. But what on earth will I do about Joe, especially since I have to be in contact with him every day?

 

The next morning, Vincent relived the dream which was so vivid, he wondered if it had been a dream or a ghost. Nevertheless, he couldn't wait to tell Diana what had happened. This was something he wanted to share just with her alone. Maybe now, he could convince himself that Diana was right for him, and it would be with Catherine's blessing.

 

Diana awoke and dressed hurriedly. She wanted to get out of her loft before Susan confronted her. Susan would think Diana had gone bonkers if she knew of the vision. And Diana decided that she wouldn't mention the episode with Joe. That would simply complicate things further. Diana realized the impromptu kiss was something that just happened for the moment, and didn't have any special significance. When she got to the office, she knew she was right. Joe was his usual self, barking orders and seemingly oblivious to everything but what was on his daily agenda; and his oblivion included Diana. He couldn't look her in the eye, probably embarassed about what happened. She felt the same way, and was grateful.

***

That night, Diana heard a soft tapping at the door to her loft. She ran to open it, knowing instinctively that it was Vincent. She hadn't lost her empathic qualities, and knew that Catherine's spirit had visited him as well.

"C'mon in," she told him. I knew it was you."

Vincent entered the loft, seeming to fill it with his amazing presence. "I have something to tell you,

Diana."

She motioned for him to sit down. "Yes, I know."

"How do you know?"

"I'm an empath, or did you forget?"

Vincent was puzzled. He knew she had the same abilities as he did with Catherine. But he could only sense emotions. He couldn't read minds, and neither could she, he reasoned. "Catherine came to me in a dream last night, and gave us her blessing," he finally blurted out. Then he drew a deep breath.

"She visited me also," Diana said, softly.

"Ah, so that's how you knew. Do you know what this means, Diana?"

"Well, I wasn't exactly pining for Catherine's blessing, but I know you were. So does this mean you think we should give it a try?" Diana twisted a strand of hair around her finger. It was so quiet in the room, she could hear Vincent's breathing.

"Diana, for so long I was torn between betraying Catherine's memory and wanting to have another chance at love with you. I just couldn't make a decision." Vincent stared at the floor.

"And now?" Diana teased, a smile fighting its way to her lips.

"You're making this harder for me than necessary," Vincent said.

"I know."

"Do you want me, Diana? Yes or no? It's as simple as that."

"I've always wanted you, Vincent. I've had serious doubts about how we would live together, since I'd have to be Above most of the time. From a practical point of view, I never knew how it would work."

"I've considered that also," Vincent agreed, putting his arm around her. "But I have my work to do in the tunnels, and you have your work Above. We could do our respective tasks during the weekdays, and be together on weekends and at nights. It would work out. We could make it work."

"I think you're right, Vincent. We have a lot of issues to overcome, but the thought of being with you always is spectacular."

"Then will you marry me, Diana? Will you be my wife and Jacob's mother?" Vincent got down on one knee, just like in one of the movies shown in the tunnels.

"Yes! Yes! Oh, Vincent, tell me this is not a dream. Tell me it's real." Diana had a fleeting thought about Susan's reaction over this unexpected turn of events.

It's real, Diana." And as if to illustrate, Vincent took her in his arms, and kissed her most passionately. Both were lost in the magnitude of the moment, enveloped in its warmth and love. Gone were the doubts and fears, and in their place, a promise of a bright tomorrow.

~